Alright, so how about, me and my boyfriend bought a super nice computer. We paid a lot of money for this super nice computer, the sum of which will not be discussed, and the fucking Bluetooth keyboard and the god damn mouse barely work. At first it was just the keyboard being a little bitch. I would try to type something, like “I’m trying to type something” and it would spit out the phrase “I’mmmmmmm trngggggggggggggggggggg ttttttttttttttt smmmmmmmmmmmmmmmming”
It worked about a day before it started pulling that shit. I was really mad it wasn’t working, not just because I paid a fuckton for the computer so I EXPECT EVERYTHING THAT COMES WITH IT TO WORK, but also because I like this keyboard. A lot. It fits my fat man hands very nicely, and the keys don’t press down very far at all, so it makes it easy to jump around the keys without me getting my god damned finger stuck beside the keys as was the habit with my old desktop keyboard.
And you know what? I had to go back to using that desktop keyboard. I hated it, too. I didn’t realize how much hated it until I went from using this keyboard to using that old shitty one. After me not using it for like two or three months it finally decided to stop being a prick and it’s finally working. Though some sentences do still occasionally come out like thhhhhhhhhhhhissssssssssss, or my keyboard just refuses to type a letter in one of the words I’m trying so desperately to spell correctly, I would much rather put up with its rebel nature than with the incompetence of my old, fat keyboard.
On top of using my new keyboard again lately I have also started taking calcium pills. I was supposed to have been taking them for about a year now, because the depo provera shot sucks the calcium out of your bones worse than an expensive prostitute sucks a cock, but I haven’t gotten around to buying them. In my defense I have the memory of a goldfish. So there’s that.
They’re fucking huge though. Like the size of my thumb huge. And I’m supposed to take two of these fuckers a day. TWO A DAY. Could you swallow your thumb twice a day? If you can, well then, bravo on having regenerative thumbs. I’m very impressed, and would like to discuss where you acquired this skill. I would like to have it.
Another horrific side effect of the depo provera shot, which is a form of birth control in case you didn’t know, is that you gain weight on it. I’m not sure if this is because it slows your metabolism, or if it’s because it just makes you hungry all the time. I don’t know the answer because I fucking refuse to gain weight, and nothing these side effect labels say are going to make me. Personally though I haven’t been feeling any hungrier than I normally do, but I might forget how hungry normally feel because I’ve been on the shot for a year now.I think my normal hunger rate was famished all the time, though. Pretty sure.
If you girls out there are looking for a form of birth control, or if you have really super bad periods and you’re looking for a way to make them chill the fuck out, this is the way to go. I’ve been on the pill, on the shot and on the patch, and the shot by far is the best. You only have to get it once every three months so you don’t worry about forgetting it and getting pregnant or you forgot one day two weeks ago and you still don’t feel safe and holy shit do I have to take these sugar pills??? You just get a shot once every 3 months. It’s also 1% more effective. If you really, really don’t want to get pregnant because it seems like every single one of your female friends is pregnant, that’s a lot of fucking percent. This puts it at a 99.8% working rate! The shot itself doesn’t even hurt, and it has the same side effects as the pill. There’s just a very slight burning as it goes in your veins, then you can’t use your arm for the next half of the day. Unless you get it in your hip. I’ve never gotten it in my hip, so I don’t really know what that does.I hope you can still use your hips for the rest of the day, or the point of getting the birth control shot kind of just goes right out the window.
On a completely and catastrophically different note, I was cleaning my blog up a bit- fixing the widgets, editing some links- and I found out how to be a giant creep! Now I know who my subscribers are. I actually…just forgot how to get there within about three minutes of straying my mind away from it, but I’m sure I’ll remember sometime!
Anyways, now I can personally thank Snowblondie and I’monthebandwagon for following me when I was complaining about people not following!
I’m about 98% sure you did it out of sympathy, but thanks anyways.
Wow that was awful. I had to go to past history just to remember how I got to the subscribers.
But anyways, now I’ll never forget. I have it stored in the back of my head.
Hot damn this post has a lot of words in it. The most words I’ve ever typed, except one or two other times. But it’s the most words I’ve ever typed in a long ass time, so there’s that. I might start putting pictures in my blog, but not ones I draw just ones I find that might have to do with what I’m talking about. I don’t know, though. I feel like maybe that would just be annoying and make the blog harder to read, and then you guys would look at the pictures before you look at the words describing the pictures, because I know how that works you assholes. I DO IT TOO I KNOW HOW IT WORKS.
So I don’t know, maybe I’ll just keep my drawings up. If I ever even get time to do anymore.